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Many of us have had that beautiful daydream: two dogs curled up together, sleeping peacefully. A picture of perfect, furry harmony. It’s a lovely thought, but the reality of adding a second dog to your home is rarely as simple as "doubling the joy." In truth, it fundamentally shifts the rhythm of your household and alters the unique relationship you share with your current companion. Before you dive back into the world of puppy breath, chew toys and chaos, it’s worth taking a moment for some honest, thoughtful planning to ensure the timing is truly right for everyone involved.
A New Dog Isn’t a DIY Behavioral Solution It’s a common hope: perhaps a new friend will cure your current dog’s separation anxiety or burn off that excess energy. However, it’s important to remember that dogs are social learners, not licensed therapists. While we hope they’ll teach each other the "good stuff," they are just as likely to swap bad habits—like a masterclass in counter-surfing or backyard excavations. Before expanding the pack, ensure your first dog has a solid foundation. You should be ready to welcome a new individual project, rather than looking for a furry fixer-upper to solve existing challenges. Does Your Dog Actually Want a Roommate? As humans, we naturally project our desire for constant companionship onto our pets. But let’s be honest: just because you enjoy a coffee with a friend doesn’t mean you want them living in your spare room forever. Many dogs are perfectly content as "only children." A dog who loves a spirited playdate might feel very differently about sharing their favorite squeaky toy, their preferred napping spot, or—most importantly—your undivided attention 24/7. Your primary responsibility is to the dog already in your home; consider their specific personality and energy levels before deciding if a sibling is truly in their best interest. The Two-Puppy Trap The idea of bringing home two puppies at once can seem efficient—get the house-training over with in one go, right? In reality, it often creates a "two-puppy trap." These youngsters can bond so intensely with each other that they effectively tune out their human family, making training and confidence-building an uphill battle. The real danger here is over-dependence. When two dogs grow up inseparable, they often fail to develop the confidence to navigate the world—or even their own daily routine—without the other. Tragically, this creates a heartbreaking situation later in life: if one dog passes away, the survivor is often left completely unmoored, having never truly learned how to cope or function as an individual. You aren't just raising two dogs; you are raising two distinct individuals. To avoid this, you must commit to the extra work: separate walks, separate training sessions, and rotating crate time. It’s not just about managing behavior; it’s about ensuring they grow up to rely on you as their steady anchor and guide, not on their sibling. It takes more effort, but it builds a stronger, more resilient relationship for the long haul. The Humbling Reality of the Multi-Dog Life Even with years of professional training under my belt, I find the transition to a multi-dog household to be a fascinatingly complex puzzle. I’m currently preparing to welcome a third dog (yes, a third dog… stay tuned) into my own home, and it’s a humbling reminder that complexity doesn’t just add up—it multiplies. Personally, I deeply enjoy the journey of training and getting to know each dog as a distinct individual, but it is a process I never take lightly. It is deeply intentional, with a clear goal in mind, which is why I prefer to wait about 3 to 5 years between adding a new member to our pack. In my experience, most families can manage two dogs, but it is that third dog that often tips the scales into chaos if proper training and leadership aren't already firmly established. It’s not just about finding space for another dog bed; it’s about carefully managing pack dynamics, ensuring everyone gets the individual attention they crave, and maintaining the kind of steady leadership that makes every dog in the house feel safe and secure. Being Their Best Advocate There’s a dangerous old myth that dogs should just "figure it out" amongst themselves. In reality, this approach is a recipe for conflict. When you don’t intervene, you aren't letting them work things out; you’re often just letting them escalate until a fight breaks out, which ultimately erodes their trust in you as their protector. As the person in charge, your most important job is to advocate for your dogs by actively managing their environment. By stepping in to address those subtle "doggy whispers"—a stiffened tail, a brief freeze, or a look of avoidance—you step into a vital leadership role. It shows your dogs that you are present, aware, and ready to handle things before they boil over. By providing structured space, dedicated one-on-one time, and enforcing much-needed rest periods, you create a home where everyone can thrive without the constant pressure of negotiation. So, Are You Truly Ready? You’ll know you’re ready when your current dog is reliable and relaxed, you have a deep understanding of their temperament, and your life has the stability to absorb a new whirlwind of energy. If you find you have the extra time, the endless patience, and the emotional capacity for another unique individual—rather than just a playmate for your first dog—then you are absolutely on the right path. Choosing to wait isn’t a sign of failure; it’s a profound commitment to the well-being of the dog you already love. By focusing on your current structure now, you aren't just saying "no"—you’re ensuring that when you do finally add to your pack, you’re building on the strongest possible foundation. Need a Little Guidance Before You Take the Leap? If you are wondering whether your current dog is truly ready for a roommate, or if you want to brush up on those foundational skills to make the transition smoother, you don't have to navigate this journey alone. Reach out to us—we would love to help you assess your dog's temperament, strengthen their training, and ensure your home is set up for long-term success before you add another member to your pack. As a trainer, one of the most common training goals I see is teaching a dog to come when called, and understandably so. A reliable recall gives dogs more freedom, keeps them safe, and creates a whole different level of trust between dog and handler.
Generally, failed recalls come down to two things: relationship and practice. If your dog consistently chooses the environment over you, returning simply is not valuable enough yet. Secondly, reliability comes down to how the behavior has been trained and practiced over time. I also recommend having two different recall words. One Casual Recall (such as “Come”), which simply means “get close to me,” and one Critical Recall, which means return immediately and stay with you. The Critical Recall is the one we are focusing on here. If your dog’s recall has become optional, you may be falling into one of these three common traps. 1. The Premature Freedom Trap The Sabotage: Many owners give off-leash freedom far too soon. We often assume that because a dog listens in the living room, they are ready for a much harder real-world environment like a park or trail. Dogs do not generalize well naturally; just because they understand something in your kitchen does not mean they automatically understand it at the park with squirrels, smells, people, and other dogs around them. The Key to Success: Slow down. Start training in low distraction environments first, even something as simple as your hallway or backyard. Then slowly build difficulty over time. When you move to a new location, treat it like you are starting over from the beginning. A long line is one of the best tools for this because it allows you to safely practice without giving your dog the opportunity to rehearse ignoring you. 2. The Frustration Trap The Sabotage: It is frustrating when your dog goes on a twenty-minute joyride while you stand there repeatedly calling them. But if you scold or show frustration once they finally return, you have unintentionally punished the very behavior you were asking for. From the dog’s perspective, coming back to you resulted in something unpleasant. The Key to Success: Coming back to you should always feel worthwhile to your dog. No matter how long it took, the moment your dog returns should be met with praise, connection, and something they truly value. That might be food, a toy, affection, or even being released back to play again. And yes, sending them back out to continue exploring can absolutely be part of the reward. 3. The “Fun Is Over” Effect The Sabotage: If the only time your dog hears the recall word is when the fun ends, the leash goes back on, or they have to leave the park, they quickly start to make that connection. To the dog, “Come” starts predicting the end of everything enjoyable. Naturally, they begin weighing their options, and often the environment wins. The Key to Success: Practice “Recall and Release.” Call your dog back throughout the walk just to reward them, reconnect for a moment, then send them right back out to explore again. This teaches your dog that coming back to you does not always mean the fun is over. Instead, the recall becomes part of the fun itself. Pro Tip: Lure It, Love It, Label It One of the most common mistakes I see is owners repeating the recall word over and over while the dog is distracted or before the dog truly understands the behavior. Instead, focus on this process:
Choosing a unique recall word can also help protect the cue from being overused casually by other people. Building a reliable Critical Recall takes time, consistency, and a lot of repetition in different environments. But when done properly, it creates freedom, safety, and a stronger relationship between you and your dog. For clients looking for reliability at greater distances or in more challenging environments, I also teach the safe and humane use of the e-collar. When introduced properly, it can provide incredible clarity and freedom for both dog and handler. Ready to transform your dog's recall? Stop stressing about off-leash freedom. Book a consultation today to get started. It’s one of the most common questions I get asked, and it’s a great question: "Do you train with positive reinforcement?" Here's my answer.
If you’ve spent any time researching dog training lately, you’ve noticed it’s become loud. There are strong opinions, labels being thrown around, and a growing pressure to pick one approach and stand firmly in it. This noise often pulls the conversation away from what truly matters: the dog in front of us. I’m not interested in winning a debate; I’m interested in being fair to the dog and helping them succeed in the real world. So, yes, positive reinforcement is a big part of my approach. But it’s not the whole picture. Fairness Over Philosophy When I look at a dog, I’m not thinking about my training label. I’m asking a simpler question: What is fair to this dog, in this moment? Fairness matters more than philosophy. Dogs don’t care about styles; they care about whether the information we give them makes sense; clarity. They are constantly trying to figure out how to navigate the world we’ve placed them in. When our information is unclear or inconsistent, they don’t become stubborn—they become confused. Confusion quickly turns into frustration for both the dog and the person on the other end of the leash. The Danger of the Human Lens Part of the confusion stems from how deeply we love our dogs. We bring them into our families, and it becomes easy to view them through a human lens. We assign intention to their behaviors, assume they “know better,” and try to reason or explain things to them. While there is nothing wrong with loving your dog like family, a dog is not human, and we cannot treat them as though they are. Respecting the dog means communicating in a way that actually makes sense to them. They don't need long explanations or repeated commands; they need clarity, patterns, and immediate feedback. Where Positive Reinforcement Shines This is where positive reinforcement plays a crucial role. We reward the behaviors we want to see more of, acknowledge good decisions, and build engagement. When a dog offers eye contact and hears “yes,” or makes a calm choice that is recognized, they understand that their choices matter. This builds confidence, trust, and a relationship where the dog is willing to try. However, on its own, positive reinforcement can leave a gap. The Need for Clear Direction If a dog is only ever told when they’re right, but never given clear information when they’re wrong, they are left to piece things together on their own. Imagine going through life with encouragement but only silence when you miss the mark—that leads to frustration. Dogs feel this frustration because their world isn’t fully explained to them. Clarity isn't just about praise; it is also about direction. The Place for a Clear "No" Sometimes, that direction includes a clear “no”. This isn't harsh or emotional—it's just a clear way of saying, "That choice won’t work; let’s try something else". Think about your own life: the people you respect most are often those who are consistent and maintain fair rules. In contrast, when boundaries constantly shift or are nonexistent, it creates uncertainty and anxiety, not freedom, for everyone involved. For a dog, this lack of clarity is destabilizing. Fair and consistent boundaries are not a form of restriction; they are a fundamental support system for the relationship. They give the dog something reliable to lean on, which in turn allows them to relax, trust your guidance, and truly settle down. Correction vs. Punishment The word “correction” often makes people uneasy. But in my world, a correction is never punitive. Punishment is unfair and breaks trust. A correction is a non-emotional interruption to create a pause—a chance for the dog to stop, think, and shift. This interruption may sometimes be physical, like a quick pop on the collar or a squirt of water on the nose, but the intention is never to cause harm; it is simply to interrupt the behaviour. It is fair to the moment. Crucially, we don't just stop the behavior and walk away. We must guide the dog and show them what to do instead. Without that guidance, a correction is just noise. With it, it becomes communication. I look at it like a sentence. The interruption is only the first word, the guidance completes the sentence and makes it have meaning. Clarity Completes the Picture It all comes back to communication that is clear, calm, and consistent. Dogs don’t need more words; they need better timing, clarity, and direction. When that happens, the dog stops reacting and starts thinking—they pause, look, process, and make different choices. The goal isn't a perfectly obedient robot, but a dog who understands how to navigate the world in a way that works for both of you. I use positive reinforcement as a foundational part of training. But my responsibility is to provide clear, fair communication so the dog understands the full picture: what works, what doesn't, and how to move forward. Positive reinforcement builds the relationship. Clarity, through fairness, is what completes it. When those two elements come together, that’s when you finally find the companion you’ve always wanted—a dog that is truly present with you, calm in their own skin, and ready to navigate life by your side. Ready to start your journey? Contact us today to learn how we can help you and your dog build a relationship based on trust, clarity, and success. Instinct Canine Training didn’t begin as a business plan. It began as an instinct. A desire to do better for dogs, and for the people who love them. A quiet but persistent feeling that training could be more thoughtful, more honest, and far more human than what I was seeing. And at the centre of it all was Mia. Mia is my heart and soul dog. The kind of dog who changes how you think, how you listen, and how you show up. She wasn’t easy, and she wasn’t meant to be. She is sensitive, intuitive, deeply aware of energy and environment, and she made it very clear early on that behaviour is never just behaviour. It’s communication. That lesson became the backbone of Instinct Canine Training. The Long Way Into Training (and the Right One) I always wanted to train dogs. That part was never a question. My path just took the long way around. I started in college studying Animal Care, then moved into service dog work, followed by several years working in veterinary clinics. Those experiences shaped how I see behaviour. When you watch dogs in exam rooms, under stress, in pain, or overwhelmed, you quickly learn that behaviour, health, environment, and emotion are deeply intertwined. From there, I worked in pet insurance, a role that provided an immense depth of knowledge about animal health. I gained a deep understanding of the medical conditions dogs face, how they present, how often they’re missed, and how profoundly they can affect behaviour. That experience taught me to always consider health as part of the puzzle. Dogs who don’t feel well don’t act normally. Just like us. That perspective stays with me in every case I work on. Everything shifted after I got Mia. I enrolled in dog training classes as a client, wanting to learn more. Curiosity turned into commitment, and I signed up for a one-year apprenticeship. I was hired within six months. I loved that job. It gave me a strong foundation, real-world experience, and mentorship I will always be grateful for. That first start mattered, and I don’t forget it. When Everything Changed Then COVID hit. Like many parents, I suddenly needed to be home for young children navigating online school. (It was, politely, rough.) Training full-time outside the home wasn’t possible, but dogs and their people still needed support, arguably more than ever. I began taking on clients one at a time. Word of mouth spread. Eventually, I started offering small group classes out of a rented dance studio. COVID was a defining time for dog training. Many people rose quickly as “trainers” during that period. Some meant well. Some had confidence without depth. And over time, most of them disappeared. Dog training is a tough profession. Few people realize how much of it is education, admin, emotional labour, and responsibility. And fewer still have the skills required to create lasting results. That isn’t me being boastful. Far from it. I don’t think I will ever know enough. This field demands humility and continued learning. What I do know is what my clients consistently tell me, they see something different, and it works. I’m not sure what the secret sauce is.But I do know I adore what I’m doing. The 80% You Didn’t Expect Dog training is about 20% dog. The other 80% is people. Every behaviour concern exists inside a real household, with real routines, real stressors, real limitations, and real emotions. If a training plan doesn’t fit your life, it won’t last. And if it doesn’t last, it doesn’t matter how technically correct it is. Somewhere along the way, I realized that being a dog trainer also meant becoming a listener. A guide. Occasionally, a therapist. Behaviour work requires empathy, honesty, and the ability to meet people where they are, not where we think they should be. There’s no judgment here. Only problem-solving, clarity, and support. Mia, My “Good Dog, Bad Dog” Mia is an incredible dog. She is intuitive in ways that still amaze me. When my daughter has an anxiety attack, Mia knows. She stays close, grounds her, and helps bring her back down. She’s affectionate, deeply connected, well trained, and hands down the best cuddler I’ve ever known. She also counter-surfs. If we leave the house without blocking off the kitchen, she will help herself to the garbage. Yes, I know crates prevent that. We chose baby gates. Life is full of compromises. She is also a guard dog. She barks to alert. That took me time to accept. For a long while, I tried to train it out of her, until I realized I was fighting who she is rather than understanding her role. Mia taught me to honour the dog in front of me, not the dog I thought I should have. I carry that with every training session I have with clients. She is my good dog and my bad dog. And she is the reason Instinct Canine Training exists. Why Instinct Canine Training Instinct Canine Training is built on relationships. Dog to human.Human to human.Trust at both ends of the leash. It’s about fulfilment, not perfection. About building a relationship where dogs feel understood and supported, and people feel capable and confident. It’s about learning how to communicate clearly, trust the process, and trust each other. At its core, this work is about honouring the dog in front of you, supporting the human on the other end of the leash, and creating a relationship that feels steady, respectful, and sustainable in real life. With that, you will have a dog who follows you to the ends of the earth. That’s the why. Everything else grows from there. 💜 Building a strong relationship with our dogs is not just about companionship; it forms the foundation for effective training and mutual understanding. Just like in human relationships, setting fair boundaries and expectations is crucial for a harmonious interaction. When we establish a relationship based on trust and respect, we create a framework where our dogs can learn what behaviours are appropriate and which ones are not. Trust Through Fair Boundaries In any relationship, boundaries are essential. They provide a clear structure for interaction and ensure that both parties understand what is expected of them. With our dogs, setting fair boundaries means guiding them gently but firmly towards desirable behaviours. When giving a command, it's important to do so clearly, with confidence. This means you're not asking your dog to do something; you're telling them! A strong bond is built when your dog looks to you for guidance, showing they trust your direction. If your dog doesn't follow the command, guide them into the position you asked for on the first try, ensuring clarity without needing a second attempt or treat. I always encourage clients to communicate with their dogs using the firm, fast, and fair method. By using the 3 F’s—Fast, Firm, and Fair—you can effectively guide your dog, building a strong and trusting bond. The Fast, Firm and Fair Method Fast: Timing is everything. When your dog doesn’t behave the way you want, respond quickly so they know exactly what you're addressing. This is true for both good and bad behaviour—catching the moment ensures your dog connects their actions with your response. If you're slow, they might not understand why you're stepping in. Firm: Communicating with confidence and clarity is key. I don’t negotiate or plead with my dog; I tell them what to do. Being firm means setting expectations, not asking for them. Your dog should know that when you give a command, you mean it. It's about being clear and confident without crossing into harshness—firm doesn’t mean unfair, just no room for confusion. Fair: Fairness is context-dependent. I won’t correct a dog for not following a command they haven’t learned, but if my dog knows "sit" and ignores me, I will follow through and guide them into the position. There’s no option for a second try or treat at that moment. Being fair means balancing the consequence with the situation—like at work, where your boss would correct a small mistake without extreme measures, but a serious offense would lead to more significant action. By keeping things proportionate, you build trust and a healthy relationship with your dog. Correcting Behaviour with Compassion Correcting behaviour is another aspect where a strong relationship comes into play. As a trainer who works with a variety of dogs, it is not my place to correct your dog because there is no established relationship between us. Correction, when necessary, should come from someone the dog trusts and respects—usually the owner. There are exceptions to this rule, particularly in situations where I perceive a danger to others. In such cases, I may step in, but this typically involves dogs that are confident enough to handle the correction without it damaging their trust. It saddens me to hear from clients who have previously worked with trainers who lacked the patience to guide them through the training process and instead resorted to harsh corrections. Often, these corrections are delivered to nervous dogs who are already struggling with anxiety. The result is heartbreaking: a dog who is "shut down," cowering in fear and unwilling to work. This approach not only damages the dog’s trust but also hinders their ability to learn and grow. Play as a Relationship Building and Bonding Tool Play is a powerful tool for building relationships with our dogs. Games like tug-of-war and fetch not only provide physical exercise but also teach important lessons in impulse control and obedience. Before engaging in play, it's beneficial to ensure that our dogs demonstrate self-control and stop when asked. This reinforces their understanding of boundaries and enhances their responsiveness to commands during playtime. Looking Forward: The Importance of Continuous Learning As a dog trainer, I am constantly seeking new knowledge and techniques to improve my relationship with dogs. I am excited to attend a seminar this month focusing on play, where I hope to deepen my understanding of how play can further strengthen the bond between dogs and handlers. I will share my reflections in another post! A Lifelong Partnership By nurturing a strong relationship with our dogs, we cultivate loyalty and cooperation. A well-trained dog who respects boundaries is not only a joy to be around, but also a reliable companion. When dogs trust that we have their best interests at heart and will guide them safely, they are more willing to follow our lead. Ultimately, investing in our relationship with our dogs pays off in loyalty, obedience, and a deep bond that enriches both our lives. Building a relationship with our dogs based on trust, fair boundaries, and constructive play is not just about training; it's about fostering a partnership that lasts a lifetime. Found these tips helpful? Save this article to reference later, or send to someone who may find it useful! |
Meet the authorAnna Marie Stewart, DTTA-CPDT, is the owner and founder of Instinct Canine Training in Burlington, Ontario. Her passion and love of dogs is evident to anyone who works with her, and is an experienced trainer who works with a variety of clients to achieve a well-mannered dog. Categories
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